Sahaabiyaat: Female Companions of the Prophet
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The life of 'Aa'ishah is proof that a woman can be far more learned than men and that she can be the teacher of scholars and experts. Her life is also proof that a woman can exert influence over men and women and provide them with inspiration and leadership. Her life is also proof that the same woman can be totally feminine and be a source of pleasure, joy and comfort to her husband.
She did not graduate from any university there were no universities as such in her day. But still her utterances are studied in faculties of literature, her legal pronouncements are studied in colleges of law and her life and works are studied and researched by students and teachers of Muslim history as they have been for over a thousand years.
The bulk of her vast treasure of knowledge was obtained while she was still quite young. In her early childhood she was brought up by her father who was greatly liked and respected for he was a man of wide knowledge, gentle manners and an agreeable presence. Moreover he was the closest friend of the noble Prophet who was a frequent visitor to their home since the very early days of his mission.
In her youth, already known for her striking beauty and her formidable memory, she came under the loving care and attention of the Prophet himself. As his wife and close companion she acquired from him knowledge and insight such as no woman has ever acquired.
'Aa'ishah became the Prophet's wife in Makkah when she was most likely in the tenth year of her life but her wedding did not take place until the second year after the Hijrah when she was about fourteen or fifteen years old. Before and after her wedding she maintained a natural jollity and innocence and did not seem at all overawed by the thought of being wedded to him who was the Messenger of God whom all his companions, including her own mother and father, treated with such love and reverence as they gave to no one else.
About her wedding, she related that shortly before she was to leave her parent's house, she slipped out into the courtyard to play with a passing friend:
"I was playing on a see-saw and my long streaming hair was dishevelled," she said. "They came and took me from my play and made me ready."
They dressed her in a wedding-dress made from fine red-striped cloth from Bahrain and then her mother took her to the newly-built house where some women of the Ansaar were waiting outside the door. They greeted her with the words, "For good and for happiness may all be well!" Then, in the presence of the smiling Prophet, a bowl of milk was brought. The Prophet drank from it himself and offered it to 'Aa'ishah. She shyly declined it but when he insisted she did so and then offered the bowl to her sister Asmaa who was sitting beside her. Others also drank of it and that was as much as there was of the simple and solemn occasion of their wedding. There was no wedding feast.
Marriage to the Prophet did not change her playful ways. Her young friends came regularly to visit her in her own apartment.
"I would be playing with my dolls," she said, "with the girls who were my friends, and the Prophet would come in and they would slip out of the house and he would go out after them and bring them back, for he was pleased for my sake to have them there."
Sometimes he would say "Stay where you are" before they had time to leave, and would also join in their games. 'Aa'ishah said:
"One day, the Prophet came in when I was playing with the dolls and he said: 'O 'Aa'ishah, what game is this?' 'It is Solomon's horses,' I said and he laughed."
Sometimes as he came in he would screen himself with his cloak so as not to disturb 'Aa'ishah and her friends.
'Aa'ishah's early life in Madinah also had its more serious and anxious times. Once her father and two companions who were staying with him fell ill with a dangerous fever which was common in Madinah at certain seasons. One morning 'Aa'ishah went to visit him and was dismayed to find the three men lying completely weak and exhausted. She asked her father how he was and he answered her in verse but she did not understand what he was saying. The two others also answered her with lines of poetry which seemed to her to be nothing but unintelligible babbling. She was deeply troubled and went home to the Prophet saying:
"They are raving, out of their minds, through the heat of the fever."
The Prophet asked what they had said and was somewhat reassured when she repeated almost word for word the lines they had uttered and which made sense although she did not fully understand them then. This was a demonstration of the great retentive power of her memory which as the years went by were to preserve so many of the priceless sayings of the Prophet.
Of the Prophet's wives in Madinah, it was clear that it was 'Aa'ishah that he loved most. From time to time, one or the other of his companions would ask:
"O Messenger of God, whom do you love most in the world?"
He did not always give the same answer to this question for he felt great love for many for his daughters and their children, for Abu Bakr, for 'Ali, for Zayd and his son Usamah. But of his wives the only one he named in this connection was 'Aa'ishah. She too loved him greatly in return and often would seek reassurance from him that he loved her. Once she asked him:
"How is your love for me?"
"Like the rope's knot," he replied meaning that it was strong and secure. And time after time thereafter, she would ask him:
"How is the knot?"
and he would reply: "Ala haalihaa." (in the same condition)
As she loved the Prophet so was her love a jealous love and she could not bear the thought that the Prophet's attentions should be given to others more than seemed enough to her. She asked him:
"O Messenger of God, tell me of yourself. If you were between the two slopes of a valley, one of which had not been grazed whereas the other had been grazed, on which would you pasture your flocks?"
"On that which had not been grazed," replied the Prophet.
"Even so," she said, "and I am not as any other of your wives. Everyone of them had a husband before you, except myself."
The Prophet smiled and said nothing. Of her jealousy, 'Aa'ishah would say in later years:
"I was not, jealous of any other wife of the Prophet as I was jealous of Khadijah, because of his constant mentioning of her and because God had commanded him to give her good tidings of a mansion in Paradise of precious stones. And whenever he sacrificed a sheep he would send a fair portion of it to those who had been her intimate friends. Many a time I said to him:
"It is as if there had never been any other woman in the world except Khadijah."
Once, when Aishah complained and asked why he spoke so highly of "an old Quraysh w
oman", the Prophet was hurt and said: "She was the wife who believed in me when others rejected me. When people gave me the lie, she affirmed my truthfulness. When I stood forsaken, she spent her wealth to lighten the burden of my sorrow.."
Despite her feelings of jealousy which nonetheless were not of a destructive kind, 'Aa'ishah was really a generous soul and a patient one. She bore with the rest of the Prophet's household poverty and hunger which often lasted for long periods. For days on end no fire would be lit in the sparsely furnished house of the Prophet for cooking or baking bread and they would live merely on dates and water. Poverty did not cause her distress or humiliation; self-sufficiency when it did come did not corrupt her style of life.
Once the Prophet stayed away from his wives for a month because they had distressed him by asking of him that which he did not have. This was after the Khaybar expedition when an increase of riches whetted the appetite for presents. Returning from his self-imposed retreat, he went first to 'Aa'ishah's apartment. She was delighted to see him but he said he had received Revelation which required him to put two options before her. He then recited the verses:
{O Prophet! Say to your wives: If you desire the life of this world and its adornments, then come and I will bestow its goods upon you, and I will release you with a fair release. But if you desire God and His Messenger and the abode of the Hereafter, then verily God has laid in store for you an immense reward for such as you who do good.}
'Aa'ishah's reply was:
"Indeed I desire God and His Messenger and the abode of the Hereafter,"
and her response was followed by the same response from all the other wives of the Prophet.
She stuck to her choice both during the lifetime of the Prophet and afterwards. Later when the Muslims were favored with enormous riches, she was given a gift of one hundred thousand dirhams. She was fasting when she received the money and she distributed the entire amount to the poor and the needy even though she had no provisions in her house. Shortly after, a maidservant said to her: "Could you buy meat for a dirham with which to break your fast?"
"If I had remembered, I would have done so," she said.
The Prophet's affection for 'Aa'ishah remained to the last. During his final illness, it was to 'Aa'ishah's apartment that he went at the suggestion of his wives. For much of the time he lay there on a couch with his head resting on her chest or on her lap. She it was who took a toothstick from her brother, chewed upon it to soften it and gave it to the Prophet. Despite his weakness, he rubbed his teeth with it vigorously. Not long afterwards, he lost consciousness and 'Aa'ishah thought it was the onset of death, but after an hour he opened his eyes.
'Aa'ishah it is who has preserved for us these dying moments of the most honoured of God's creation, His beloved Messenger may He shower His choicest blessings on him.
When he opened his eyes again, 'Aa'ishah remembered the words of the Prophet that he had once said to her:
"No Prophet is taken by death until he has been shown his place in Paradise and then offered the choice, to live or die."
"He will not now choose us," she said to herself.
Then she heard him murmur: "With the supreme communion in Paradise, with those upon whom God has showered His favor, the Prophets, the martyrs and the righteous..." Again she heard him murmur: "O Lord, with the supreme communion," and these were the last words she heard him speak. Gradually his head grew heavier upon her chest, until others in the room began to lament, and 'Aa'ishah laid his head on a pillow and joined them in lamentation.
In the floor of 'Aa'ishah's room near the couch where he was lying, a grave was dug in which was buried the Seal of the Prophets amid much bewilderment and great sorrow.
'Aa'ishah lived on almost fifty years after the passing away of the Prophet. She had been his wife for a decade. Much of this time was spent in learning and acquiring knowledge of the two most important sources of God's guidance, the Qur'aan and the Sunnah of His Prophet. 'Aa'ishah was one of three wives (the other two being Hafsah and Umm Salamah) who memorized the Revelation. Like Hafsah, she had her own script of the Qur'aan written after the Prophet had died.
So far as the Prophetic Narrations or sayings of the Prophet are concerned, 'Aa'ishah is one of four persons (the others being Abu Hurayrah, 'Abdullah ibn 'Umar, and Anas ibn Malik) who transmitted more than two thousand sayings. Many of these pertain to some of the most intimate aspects of personal behavior which only someone in 'Aa'ishah's position could have learnt. What is most important is that her knowledge of Hadeeth was passed on in written form by at least three persons including her nephew 'Urwah who became one of the greatest scholars among the generation after the Companions.
Many of the learned companions of the Prophet and their followers benefitted from Aishah's knowledge. Abu Musa al-Ashari once said:
"If we, the companions of the Messenger of God, had any difficulty on a matter, we asked 'Aa'ishah about it."
Her nephew Urwah asserts that she was proficient not only in Islamic Jursiprudence but also in medicine (tibb) and poetry. Many of the senior companions of the Prophet came to her to ask for advice concerning questions of inheritance which required a highly skilled mathematical mind. Scholars regard her as one of the earliest scholars of Islamic Jurisprudence of Islaam along with persons like 'Umar ibn al-Khattab, 'Ali and 'Abdullah ibn 'Abbas. The Prophet referring to her extensive knowledge of Islaam is reported to have said (the narration is weak, but the meaning is sound): "Learn a portion of your religion (deen) from this red colored lady." "Humayra" meaning "Red-coloured" was an epithet given to 'Aa'ishah by the Prophet.
'Aa'ishah not only possessed great knowledge but took an active part in education and social reform. As a teacher she had a clear and persuasive manner of speech and her power of oratory has been described in superlative terms by al-Ahnaf who said:
"I have heard speeches of Abu Bakr and 'Umar, 'Uthman and 'Ali and the Khulafaa' up to this day, but I have not heard speech more persuasive and more beautiful from the mouth of any person than from the mouth of 'Aa'ishah."
Men and women came from far and wide to benefit from her knowledge behind a screen. The number of women is said to have been greater than that of men. Besides answering enquiries, she took boys and girls, some of them orphans, into her custody and trained them under her care and guidance. This was in addition to her relatives who received instruction from her. Her house thus became a school and an academy.
Some of her students were outstanding. We have already mentioned her nephew 'Urwah as a distinguished reporter of Hadeeth (Prophetic Narrations). Among her women pupils is the name of 'Amrah bint 'Abdur-Rahman. She is regarded by scholars as one of the trustworthy narrators of hadith and is said to have acted as 'Aa'ishah's secretary receiving and replying to letters addressed to her. The example of 'Aa'ishah in promoting education and in particular the education of Muslim women in the laws and teachings of Islaam is one which needs to be followed.
After Khadijah al-Kubra (the Great) and Fatimah az-Zahraa' (the Resplendent), 'Aa'ishah as-Siddiqah (the one who affirms the Truth) is regarded as the best woman in Islaam. Because of the strength of her personality, she was a leader in every field in knowledge, in society, in politics and in war. She often regretted her involvement in war but lived long enough to regain position as the most respected woman of her time.
She died in the year 58 AH in the month of Ramadhaan and as she instructed, was buried in al-Baqi, in the City of Light, beside other Companions of the Prophet.
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‘‘Hey! Khanas!’’ -That was how the Prophet (peace be upon him) hailed Khansa and encouraged her to recite more poems! It is normal for Arabs to shorten names in this manner, just as the Prophet (peace be upon him) used to address ‘Aa’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) as ‘Aa’ish.
Although the Prophet (peace be upon him) was not a poet, and never composed poetry like poets, as an Arab he was able to appreciate good and well composed poetry. Indeed, he had Companions who were distinguished poets and he wouldn’t discourage them from reciting their poetry, especially since they had now adopted a new method in which there was no foolishness or straying which used to be characterised in the poetry of the time of ignorance.
One such distinguished poet among the Companions was Hassaan ibn Thaabit (may Allah be pleased with him) who devoted his poetry for the defence of Islam, the Prophet (peace be upon him) and in support of the truth. He was so popular in this regard that he was conferred with the highest and noblest title of being, ‘The Messenger’s Poet’.
It was reported that he once wanted to refute the Quraysh’s poets’ and their false accusations against the Muslims after the Battle of Badr. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) asked him: “How can you ridicule them while I am one of them?” Hassan said,
“I will thread my way through them (with my satire) as a hair is carefully removed from the dough!!!”
The Prophet (peace be upon him) then said, “Say (what you have to say of poetry), may the Holy Spirit (i.e. Gabriel) support you!”
In this way we can come to see how the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) knew and appreciated the positive impacts of poetry and its impressive nature upon the minds of men. Therefore, he allowed Hassaan, Ka’b ibn Maalik and Abdullah ibn Rawaahah to make excellent use of their accurate and unfailing weapons of poetry in the battle between truth and falsehood.
It was also reported that ‘Abdullah ibn Rawahah recited a poem in the presence of Allah’s Messenger (peace be upon him) during ‘Umrah al-Qada’ when he was about to enter Makkah. He was reported to have recited among other things, the following:
“O children of disbelievers! Keep off his (meaning the Prophet) way;
Today we are going to strike so hard that a head will be removed from its base and a man will be frightened away from his friend!
We are the ones who fought you over the interpretation of its meaning (i.e. the Qur’an), as we have fought you over its revelation!
Allah has revealed in His Book that the best way to die is to be killed in His cause!
O Allah! I Believe in the Prince (with whom You sent the Book), and I believe that the only true way is to accept him!”
When ‘Umar heard this, he flew into a rage and wanted to stop 'Abdullah from reciting more poems. He rebuked him saying,
“O son of Rawahah, are you reciting poems in the presence of Allah’s Messenger and in the sanctuary of Allah?!”
‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) was worried that this maybe disliked by Allah and his Messenger (peace be upon him).
But the Prophet (peace be upon him) replied to him and took away his worry with his fine words: “Leave him alone ‘Umar. For, his poems hurt the disbelievers more than the throwing of arrows.”
Now that we have come to see how Islamic poetry was liked by the Prophet (peace be upon him), let’s now explore the life of the poetess: al-Khana’ (may Allah be pleased with her).
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Who was al-Khansa and what was her stance around the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him)?
Al-Khansa belonged to the tribe of Banoo Sulaym. She was extremely beautiful, well mannered and very eloquent. She started reciting poems at a young age. Initially, she wouldn’t say more than two or three lines of poetry but it was her sorrow over the death of her brother Sakhr that refined and brought out her innate talent to recite long verses of poetry. After his death, she began reciting long, emotional and extremely stylish poems to eulogize Sakhr, as well as her brother Mu‘aawiyah.
The scholars of poetry and language unanimously agree that no other woman other than al-Khansa ever attained the level of poetry al-Khansa’ recited, neither before nor after her.
In her eulogy for her brother she said (what means):
“O’ my eyes, shed tears generously! Will you not weep for Sakhr, the generous?!
Will you not shed tears for the audacious, tall and handsome young man
who possessed qualities of leadership and who lead his people?!”
Al-Khansa came to Madeenah along with a delegation from Banoo Sulaym. She then embraced Islaam and became a good Muslimah. She pledged her allegiance to the Prophet (peace be upon him) and remained truthful to it. The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) heard her recite poetry and asked her to recite more, as has been mentioned earlier. He liked her poemsand addressed her warmly. This was the first manifestation of her being around the Messenger (peace be upon him).
Al-Khansa was of the noblest plants in terms of origin, growth and fruits. But her nobility in these aspects reached its peak in the Battle of Qaadisiyah. For, it was on the day of this great Islamic conquest that al-Khansa attained prominence for being one of the leading Muslim women of all times.
This prominence revolved around two things:
1) Her admonition to her four Mujaahid sons and
2) The statement she made after their martyrdom.
O mothers of today! O Muslim women! In al-Khansa’ there is am exemplary role-model for all of you. Perhaps, after reading her biography you will realise the reality of your role in this transient life and your weighty responsibility of building the true Muslim family, which in turn will bring about a strong Ummah.
Ibn ‘Abdul-Barr reported in his book al-Istee‘ab:
“Al-Khansa’ bint ‘Amr witnessed the battle of Qaadisiyah with her four sons. She addressed them right at the eve of the battle saying,
‘My sons! You embraced Islaam and migrated willingly. By Allah, besides whom there is no other diety worthy of being worshiped, you are all sons of one man as you are sons of one woman. I have never cheated on your father. Never have I brought disgrace upon your uncle, disparaged your esteem or altered your lineage. You know the great and abundant reward that Allah has set aside for the Muslims who fight against the disbelievers. Know that the everlasting abode is better than this transient one. Allah (ta’aala) says: {O you have believe! Endure and be more patient [than your enemy], and guard your territory by stationing army units permanently at the places from where the enemy can attack you, and fear Allah, so that you may be successful.}
When you wake up tomorrow morning, Allah willing sound and healthy, go and fight against your enemy with conviction and seek Allah’s help over His enemies. When you see that the war has become tense, engage yourselves in the fight gallantly and resiliently that you may attain treasures and honour in the Abode of Eternity.’”
After this statement made by al-Khansa’ I have nothing better to say neither can I add anything. This is because her statement is beyond comment as it is comprehensive in the whole sense of the word.
The narrator proceeds:
“Her sons then left having accepted her admonition and were determined to implement her words. When the morning came, they set out early towards the battlefield and they all fought both gallantly and courageously until they were martyred, one after another."
The news of their martyrdom was swiftly approaching al-Khansa’! What was her reaction? What was she going to say?
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Here is where the greatness of al-Khansa truly manifested. When she heard of this great news she forgot her poetry, her beauty, her place among her people and all other things. She remembered nothing but Allah’s promise and the transient nature of this world. She (may Allah be pleased with her) said,
“All praise is due to Allah who honoured me with their martyrdom. And I hope that my Lord will make me join them in the Abode of His Mercy!”
It is noteworthy to add that the commander of the faithful, namely ‘Umar Ibn al-Khattab, used to give al-Khansa’ the entitlement of her four martyred sons annually which was two hundred dirhams until she died.
May Allah have mercy on al-Kahnsa’, the poetess! May Allah be pleased with this believing and patient lady! May Allah raise her ranks, just as she raised such pious, god-fearing and courageous sons. Aameen!
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Once again we will take a trip back in time and visit another great woman, Asma' bint Abi Bakr, one of the Sahabah (female Companions) of the Prophet. This journey requires that we free our minds from the ideas of modernists and pay special attention to the life this blessed companion led, and compare it to our own lives. As always, we will make this trip through the authentic narration from the Scholars of Hadith. Brace yourselves as we now journey back in time to the golden era at the time of the Prophet.
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The womb of Aaminah bint Wahb was certainly the noblest and the most honorable of all wombs because it was the womb that carried the seal of all the Prophets and the leader of the Messengers. It was in this womb that the noble fetus (Allah's Messenger) settled. This seed had been passed down from the loins of men, generation after generation until Allah in His Divine wisdom decreed that it moved into 'Abdullah ibn 'Abdul Muttalib, the youthful Qurayshi who excelled his contemporaries in greatness. 'Abdullah ibn 'Abdul Muttalib was ransomed from slaughtering, after his father had vowed to sacrifice him and had sought to fulfill his vow. He was the most precious person the Arabs had ever known.
He was not slaughtered by Allah’s will, so that the Divine choice might be actualized and firmly rooted in the history of mankind, all bearing witness to Allah's absolute Will. There is no change in His Words and there is no preventer against what He has decreed.
"Allah chose Adam, Nooh [Noah], the family of Ibraheem [Abraham] and the family of 'Imraan above the ‘Aalameen [mankind and jinn]. Offspring, one of the other, and Allah is the All-Hearer, All-Knower." (Qur'an 3: 33-34)
'Abdullah went out with his father 'Abdul-Muttalib after he had been saved from being sacrificed. A woman from Bani Asad ibn 'Abdul 'Uzza then saw him beside the Ka'bah and said to him, after having looked into his face,
"You will be given the like of the camels that were sacrificed for your ransom if you cohabit with me now."
This is because she saw something special in him. 'Abdullah replied that it was better for him to die rather than to commit an unlawful thing and that for a noble man to preserve his honor and religion was more worthy. 'Abdul-Muttalib chose Aaminah bint Wahb of the Zuhr clan as a wife for his son 'Abdullah. Aaminah was then the best Qurayshi woman in lineage and status.
A fortune-teller from Tibalah who was known as Fatimah bint Murr al-Khath'amiyah had also seen 'Abdullah. This woman was one of the most beautiful and chast of Arab women. She saw the light of prophethood in the face of 'Abdullah, she then offered herself in marriage to him but he rejected her offer.
The news of a Prophet that would come from the children of Ismaa'eel (peace be upon him), was spreading among the Arabs all over the peninsula. This news was based on what the people of the scripture had narrated and what they were informing from what was recorded in their Torah, both implicitly and explicitly. People were also finding this out from fortune-tellers and astrologers.
Even though 'Abdullah ibn 'Abdul Muttalib was a handsome youth, possessing an amazing and lofty upbringing and even though he possessed chastity and high morals and young women had sought him and asked for his hands in marriage, Allah had decreed that Aaminah would be ‘Abdullah's wife.
Aminah's womb soon bore the noble fetus of the Prophet. A few months after the pregnancy had taken place, 'Abdullah undertook a journey to Syria (Syria according to Arab geographical terminology is a region consisting of Palestine, Jordan, present day Syria and Lebanon. The city of Gaza, which is on Palestinian coast was one of the major cities that Qurayshi merchants frequented). But on his way back, he fell ill and stayed with his maternal uncles from the tribe of Bani Najjaar in Yathrib, where they nursed and took care of him. Sadly, he died because of his fatal illness and his young wife was left as a widow
Aminah was traumatized by the death of her beloved husband, who had only lived with her for a few months after their marriage. She wept bitterly and wailed severely as her fetus had already become an orphan before it had even been born. But she pushed herself to stay strong and persevere. She found consolation in 'Abdul-Muttalib who took good care of her and showed her much compassion. Her pregnancy was surprisingly very comfortable and easy.
In her dream one night someone came to her as she was sleeping and said to her,
"You are pregnant with the Leader and the Prophet of this Nation (Ummah)."
He came to her again, just before she was to give birth and said,
"Say after you deliver him, 'I seek protection for him with the One (Allah) from the evil of every jealous person.' Then name him 'Muhammad'."
In this way Aaminah continued to see dreams. More than once her dreams give her glad tidings, strengthened her, encouraged her to be patient, consoled her and indicated the greatness of the child to be born to her.
The delivery day was a great day. It was a dawn which was to remove the darkness of deviation from mankind. Yes! The Prophet (peace be upon him) was born in spring ... after cold hurricanes, the thunders of winter and after the darkness of its clouds. It was in spring, after the heat and scorching difficulties of summer and after the dryness and changes in nature which come with autumn.
Aaminah said,
"When I delivered him, a light came out with him that illuminated all that was between the East and the West. The light illuminated palaces and markets of Syria until I saw the necks of the camels in Basra. I saw three erected flags: one at the East, one at the West and the third over the Ka'bah."
'Abdul-Muttalib, the Prophet's grandfather came and took the boy named Muhammad to the Ka'bah. While circumambulating the Ka'bah he said,
"Praise be to Allah Who gave me this important boy. I seek Allah's protection for him."
Some of the above was narrated by Aminah to Haleemah, the Prophet's wet nurse.
It is here that Haleemah bint Abi Dhu'ayb entered the life of Muhammad (peace be upon him) as his second mother. But the first taste of milk which entered the Prophet's noble stomach was by a woman named Thuwaybah, the freed maid of his uncle Abu Lahab ('Abdul-'Uzza ibn 'Abdul-Muttalib) who dearly loved his brother 'Abdullah. Abu Lahab was gravely saddened by the death of his brother and when his freed maid Thuwaybah came to him and broke the good news of the birth of Muhammad (peace be upon him) to him, he was so happy that he set her free. That was the habit of the Arab noble men, as a source of pride, happiness and glory by them.
It appeared that Thuwaybah stayed with Aaminah for a few days after she delivered. Thuwaybah had also just given birth, hence she breast-fed the Prophet (peace be upon him) until Haleemah came and took him to the desert.
The role that Haleemah was to play in the Prophet's early childhood was fundamental and important. His stay with her was full of important events.
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Muhammad (peace be upon him) was now back in Makkah and was enjoying the warmth of his mother Aminah’s love and the compassionate care of his grandfather, 'Abdul-Muttalib. He was growing fast and his face was different from others as it shone forth illuminated light. His appearance brought splendor, his heart was filled with signs of guidance and transparence and his tongue was characterized with tenderness and sweetness. This was not surprising as he was being nurtured by Allah, the Exalted.
Aminah would often hug and embrace her beloved son. She would feel a unique warmth that she used to feel when she was pregnant with him. His grandfather was also dearly attached to him; 'Abdul-Muttalib - the chief of Quraysh -could not bear Muhammad's absence, and he would never tire from looking towards him. Every morning he would come to visit him at Aminah's apartment and at different times of the day. He would ask her,
"How is my son Muhammad?"
And he would hold him and hug him with the utmost love a grandfather could have for his grandchild. He would see in Muhammad the image of his son 'Abdullah who had died while still a bridegroom and whose death left in him unparalleled sorrow. What made him feel better was when he saw his grandson’s amazing characteristics which increased in him compassion and love for him.
When Muhammad (peace be upon him) reached the age of six, his mother sought permission from 'Abdul-Muttalib to go to Yathrib with her son in order to visit the grave of her beloved husband 'Abdullah and to spend some time with his maternal uncles, the Banu Najjaar. He gave her permission to go and advised her to take good care of herself and her son. Aaminah set out with her son Muhammad and Barakah, who was Aaminah's maid-servant, she used to serve Aaminah and take care of her son Muhammad (peace be upon him). This is why we see in Seerah the Prophet's great love for Barakah (may Allah be pleased with her) and why he regarded her as a member of his household and family.
Aaminah felt great pain and sorrow when she stood beside the grave of her beloved husband. She cried profusely as she clung to her orphan child. It appeared that the fever of Yathrib had affected Aaminah before she left the city. She did not realise this until she was on her way back to Makkah. Her condition became worse and while at a village called Abwa', she succumbed to her illness and breathed her last.
Muhammad (peace be upon him) wept bitterly for his mother as she was never to return. He wasn't left alone, as he had Barakah, the freed slave of his parents. Like a mother would carry her son, Barakah (may Allah be pleased with her) carried Muhammad (peace be upon him) back to Makkah.
If only she knew what a great child she was carrying back to Makkah…
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- Category: Sahaabiyaat: Female Companions of the Prophet
Asmaa' bint Abu Bakr belonged to a distinguished Muslim family. Her father, Abu Bakr, was a close friend of the Prophet and the first Caliph after his death. Her half-sister, 'Aa'ishah, was a wife of the Prophet and one of the Ummahaat al-Mu'mineen (Mothers of the Faithful). Her husband, Zubayr ibn al-'Awwaam, was one of the special personal aides of the Prophet. Her son, 'Abdullah ibn az-Zubayr, became well known for his incorruptibility and his unswerving devotion to Truth.
Asmaa', herself, was one of the first persons to accept Islaam. Only about seventeen persons including both men and women became Muslims before her. She was later given the nickname Dhat an-Nitaaqayn (the One with the Two Waistbands) because of an incident connected with the departure of the Prophet and her father from Makkah on the historic hijrah (migration) to Madinah.
Asmaa' was one of the few persons who knew of the Prophet's plan to leave for Madinah. The utmost secrecy had to be maintained because of the Quraysh plans to murder the Prophet. On the night of their departure, Asmaa' was the one who prepared a bag of food and a water-container for their journey. She did not find anything though with which to tie the containers and decided to use her waistband or nitaaq. Abu Bakr suggested that she tear it into two. This she did and the Prophet commended her action. From then on she became known as "the One with the Two Waistbands".
When the final emigration from Makkah to Madinah took place soon after the departure of the Prophet, Asmaa' was pregnant. She did not let her pregnancy or the prospect of a long and arduous journey deter her from leaving. As soon as she reached Qubaa' on the outskirts of Madinah, she gave birth to a son, 'Abdullah. The Muslims shouted Allahu Akbar (God is the Greatest) and Laa ilaaha illa Allah (There is no God but Allah) in happiness and thanksgiving because this was the first child to be born to the muhaajireen (sahaabah from had migrated from Makkah to Madinah) in Madinah.
Asmaa' became known from her title and noble qualities and for the keenness of her intelligence. She was an extremely generous person. Her son 'Abdullah once said of her,
"I have not seen two women more generous than my aunt 'Aa'ishah and my mother Asmaa'. But their generosity was expressed in different ways. My aunt would accumulate one thing after another until she had gathered what she felt was sufficient and then distributed it all to those in need. My mother, on the other hand, would not keep anything even for the morrow."
Asmaa's presence of mind in difficult circumstances was remarkable. When her father let Makkah, he took all his wealth, amounting to some six thousand dirhams, with him and did not leave any for his family. When Abu Bakr's father, Abu Quhaafah (he was still a mushrik - polytheist) heard of his departure he went to their house and said to Asmaa':
"I understand that he has left you bereft of money after he himself has abandoned you."
"No, grandfather," replied Asmaa, "in fact he has left us much money."
She took some pebbles and put them in a small recess in the wall where they used to put money. She threw a cloth over the heap and took the hand of her grandfather--he was blind--and said,
"See how much money he has left us".
Through this stratagem, Asmaa' wanted to allay the fears of the old man and to forestall him from giving them anything of his own wealth. This was because she disliked receiving any assistance from a mushrik (polytheist), even if it was her own grandfather.
She had a similar attitude to her mother and was not inclined to compromise her honor and her faith. Her mother, Qutaylah, once came to visit her in Madinah. She was not a Muslim and was divorced from her father in pre-Islamic times. Her mother brought her gifts of raisins, clarified butter and qaraz (pods of a species of sant tree). Asmaa' at first refused to admit her into her home or accept the gifts. She sent someone to 'Aa'ishah to ask the Prophet, peace be upon him, about her attitude to her mother and he replied that she should certainly admit her to her house and accept the gifts. On this occasion, the following revelation came to the Prophet:
{God forbids you not, with regard to those who do not fight you because of your faith nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them. God loves those who are just. God only forbids you with regard to those who fight you for your Faith, and drive you from your homes, and support others in driving you out, from turning to them (for friendship and protection). It is such as turn to them (in these circumstances) that do wrong.} (Surah al-Mumtahanah 6O: 8-9).
For Asmaa' and indeed for many other Muslims, life in Madinah was rather difficult at first. Her husband was quite poor and his only major possession to begin with was a horse he had bought. Asmaa' herself described these early days:
"I used to provide fodder for the horse, give it water and groom it. I would grind grain and make dough but I could not bake well. The women of the Ansaar used to bake for me. They were truly good women. I used to carry the grain on my head from az-Zubayr's plot which the Prophet had allocated to him to cultivate. It was about three farsakh (about eight kilometers) from the town's center. One day I was on the road carrying the grain on my head when I met the Prophet and a group of Sahaabah. He called out to me and stopped his camel so that I could ride behind him. I felt embarrassed to travel with the Prophet and also remembered az-Zubayr's jealousy, he was the most jealous of men. The Prophet realized that I was embarrassed and rode on."
Later, Asmaa' related to az-Zubayr exactly what had happened and he said,
"By God, that you should have to carry grain is far more distressing to me than your riding with (the Prophet)".
Clealry, Asmaa' was a person of great sensitivity and devotion. She and her husband worked extremely hard together until their situation of poverty gradually changed. At times, however, az-Zubayr treated her harshly. Once she went to her father and complained to him about this. His reply to her was:
'My daughter, have sabr (patience) for if a woman has a righteous husband and he dies and she does not marry after him, they will be brought together again in Paradise."
Az-Zubayr eventually became one of the richest men among the Sahabah but Asmaa' did not allow this to corrupt her principles. Her son, al-Mundhir once sent her an elegant dress from Iraaq made of fine and costly material. Asmaa' by this time was blind. She felt the material and said,
"It's awful. Take it back to him".
Al-Mundhir was upset and said, "Mother. it was not transparent. "
"It may not be transparent," she retorted, "but it is too tight fitting and shows the contours of the body."
Al-Mundhir bought another dress that met with her approval and she 
accepted it.
If the above incidents and aspects of Asmaa's life may easily be forgotten, then her final meeting with her son, 'Abdullah, must remain one of the most unforgettable moments in early Muslim history. At that meeting she demonstrated the keenness of her intelligence, her resoluteness and the strength of her faith.
'Abdullah was in the running for the Caliphate after the death of Yazid ibn Mu'aawiyah. The Hijaz, Egypt, Iraq, Khurasan and much of Syria were favorable to him and acknowledged him as the Caliph. The Ummayyads however continued to contest the Caliphate and to field a massive army under the command of Al-Hajjaj ibn Yusuf ath-Thaqafi. Relentless battles were fought between the two sides during which 'Abdullah ibn az-Zubayr displayed great acts of courage and heroism. Many of his supporters however could not withstand the continuous strain of battle and gradually began to desert him. Finally he sought refuge in the Sacred Mosque at Makkah. It was then that he went to his mother, now an old blind woman, and said:
"Peace be on you, Mother, and the mercy and blessings of God."
"Unto you be peace, Abdullah," she replied. "What is it that brings you here at this hour while boulders from Hajjaj's catapults are raining down on your soldiers in the Haram and shaking the houses of Makkah?"
"I came to seek your advice," he said.
"To seek my advice?" she asked in astonishment. "About what?"
"The people have deserted me out of fear of Hajjaj or being tempted by what he has to offer. Even my children and my family have left me. There is only a small group of men with me now and however strong and steadfast they are they can only resist for an hour or two more. Messengers of the Banoo Umayyah (the Umayyads) are now negotiating with me, offering to give me whatever worldly possessions I want, should I lay down my arms and swear allegiance to 'Abdul Malik ibn Marwan. What do you think?"
Raising her voice, she replied:
"It's your affair, 'Abdullah, and you know yourself better. If however you think that you are right and that you are standing up for the Truth, then persevere and fight on as your companions who were killed under your flag had shown perseverance. If however you desire the world, what a miserable wretch you are. You would have destroyed yourself and you would have destroyed your men."
"But I will be killed today, there is no doubt about it."
"That is better for you than that you should surrender yourself to Hajjaj voluntarily and that some minions of Banu Umayyah should play with your head."
"I do not fear death. I am only afraid that they will mutilate me."
"There is nothing after death that man should be afraid of. Skinning does not cause any pain to the slaughtered sheep."
'Abdullah's face beamed as he said: "What a blessed mother! Blessed be your noble qualities! I have come to you at this hour to hear what I have heard. God knows that I have not weakened or despaired. He is witness over me that I have not stood up for what I have out of love for this world and its attractions but only out of anger for the sake of God. His limits have been transgressed. Here am I, going to what is pleasing to you. So if I am killed, do not grieve for me and commend me to God."
"I shall grieve for you," said the aging but resolute Asmaa, "only if you are killed in a vain and unjust cause."
"Be assured that your son has not supported an unjust cause, nor committed any detestable deed, nor done any injustice to a Muslim or a Dhimmi (a non Muslim under the protection of the Islamic government, upon whom taxs are levied) and that there is nothing better in his sight than the pleasure of God, the Mighty, the Great. I do not say this to exonerate myself. God knows that I have only said it to make your heart firm and steadfast."
"Praise be to God who has made you act according to what He likes and according to what I like. Come close to me, my son, that I may smell and feel your body for this might be the last meeting with you."
'Abdullah knelt before her. She hugged him and smothered his head, his face and his neck with kisses. Her hands began to squeeze his body when suddenly she withdrew them and asked:
"What is this you are wearing, 'Abdullah?"
"This is my armor plate."
"This, my son, is not the dress of one who desires martyrdom. Take it off. That will make your movements lighter and quicker. Wear instead the sirwaal (a long under garment) so that if you are killed your 'awrah (private part) will not be exposed."
'Abdullah took off his armor plate and put on the sirwaal. As he left for the Haram (Holy Sanctuary i.e. The near land in the which the Ka'bah is) to join the fighting he said: "My mother, don't deprive me of your du'aa (prayer)."
Raising her hands to heaven, she prayed:
"O Lord, have mercy on his staying up for long hours and his loud crying in the darkness of the night while people slept... O Lord, have mercy on his hunger and his thirst on his Journeys from Madinah and Makkah while he fasted... O Lord, bless his righteousness to his mother and his father...O Lord, I commend him to Your cause and I am pleased with whatever You decree for him. And grant me for his sake the reward of those who are patient and who persevere."
By sunset, 'Abdullah was dead. Just over ten days later, his mother joined him. She was a hundred years old.
Age had not made her infirm nor blunted the keenness of her mind.
